Saturday, October 1, 2011

Quotes Quotes Quotes (3)

1. Every bad situation will have something positive. Even a stopped closk shows correct time twice a day. So stay positive in life.

2. It's not always right to stay in pain when you know you've already had too much... And it isn't always wrong to be happy, when you know it's about time that you deserve to be.

3. Sacrifices are sometimes useless especially if that someone doesn't know how to appreciate... They'll come to realize important things when it's already too late.

4. Don't say: "This is the best time of my life." As Homer Simpson would say, "This is the best time of my life, so far!" Best things are yet to come.

5. A perfect partner in life is someone you canbe with and talk about anything without realizing that the day is over... Someone who will always listen and feel twice the joy or pain you're going through... When you start to feel that "connection", never let it go because there's more to companionship than to love only... In the end, when all else fails, and are consumed, you will always hold on to those times when you don't even need to hear the words "I love you."

6. There's no limit to how much the heart can give but it's only the mind that can tell you to stop because your limit has been reached and cannot be exceeded.

7. Everyday, a deer awakens knowing it must outrun the fastest lion or be hunted to death. Everyday too, a lion awakens knowing it must outrun the slowest deer or starve to death. In this lifetime, it doesn't matter whether you're a deer or a lion; When the sun rises, you should be running at your best.

8. Like turtles, take one day at a time. It's not how fast you move nor how long you live, it's how you cherish every moment... Life is a gift. Enjoy it.

9. The real essence of saying the truth is not for them to believe you; instead for them to realize that you don't have time to lie.

10. Too bad, love doesn't have a "best before" seal... because perhaps it wouldn't be that painful if people knew when would it end.

11. Moving on isn't about "never looking back." It's about taking a glance at yesterday and noticing how much you've grown since then.

12. Things in life move with twists and turns. And they happen with valid reasons. So if you doubt why something happens to you, stick to this: "We can never learn to be brave and strong if the only thing in this world is joy. You have people around you too, so you don't have to fight alone."

13. Never play on someone who showed you what love means. Because only when it's too late that you'll realize you've lost something you would never ever have again.

14. Waiting for someone you love is never easy. It may even be irrelevant especially when the one you're waiting for ain't aware that you're waiting...

15. If it comes down to a choice between being unloved and being vulnerable and sensitive and emotional, then you can just keep your love.

16. When you make decisions in life, there are always two thoughts to consider... if you're half-way sure, forget it. If you're sure, think again.

17. Kinda wondering why sunset is a lot colorful than the sunrise that just actually gives us light... I guess it's the irony of life... there's 'good' in goodbyes.

18. For just once, I wanna be the reason why he cut his hair just because I told him so. The reason why he eats something just because it's my favorite food. The reason why he buys a shirt just because I have the same color. The reason why he falls asleep while holding his phone at night. The reason why he loves something he used to hate because I love it. And lastly, I wanna be the reason why he smiles and laughs. I wanna be the "because" of his every "whys."

19. Strong people make mistakes like weak people do. The difference is: strong people admit them, laugh at them and learn from them. That's how they become strong.

20. Sometimes, someone comes along and makes you doubt your love to someone... They're not better, they're just different.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Fr. Suarez' Healing Mass

After attending Fr. Suarez' healing mass last Monday, I felt lighter than ever. I just hope that this new-found optimism would last. I know that it will not be easy - to be always cheerful, to see things in perspective most of the time, and to be more patient.







My life has been better in many aspects this year. But admittedly, I've never changed. I still whine about things I want to have, and I still complain a lot. Instead of appreciating what I have, I tend to focus on what's missing in my life. After listening to Fr. Suare'z homily the other day, I reflected and told myself that really, we should live our lives to the fullest and stop complaining.

I can't promise that I won't complain ever because that will be inhuman, but I'll try at least to focus on the positive things in my life.

I want to thank the Lord for blessing me with a stable job in a reputable institution, the opportunity to pursue Graduate Studies, loving and supportive family and friends, a relationship that is bound to last forever, and a person who loves and understands me completely. I could not ask for more.

Of course, there are still a lot of things that I wish for... But I know that God will give them to me during the right time. I pray that He will grant me patience, patience, patience.

Patience reaps happiness. I should know, because I found out that true love waits. :) It may seem like forever waiting for the right person for you. But when you meet that person meant for you, you will just feel that he is indeed a gift from God that's worth the wait.

Cheers to Fr. Suarez for the wake-up call! And cheers to the Lord for his undying love for all of us. ;)

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Steady in Love

Before, I tend to measure the intensity of my feelings for a person with the level of “kilig” moments. I associate my “being all smiles” and “being on a high” with a potential of true love. But now I’m feeling that something inside me has changed.

Gone are the days when I get so envious of girls who have a very happy love life. I no longer feel the pressure to go search for ‘the one” whenever a friend of mine starts a relationship with someone new. And I don’t feel irritated anymore with my nosy aunts and uncles who kept on asking me when will I tie the knot...simply because I’ve found THE ONE. 

I guess, this quote is one of my guiding principles in my life now: “Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.”

Our relationship has calmed me in many ways. With him by my side, I’ve been slowly learning how to worry less and be more patient. So far, our relationship has been smooth and he has made me happy in a thousand ways. This does not mean though that the steadiness of our relationship makes me less dreamy in love and romance.

I still feel the jitters whenever he gets near me, I still feel giddy when he looks at me, and I feel like melting right then and there when he starts to hold me near. Just the idea of him touching me is enough to send shivers to my spine! See, it’s still the same old me! I’m still the same hopeless romantic Nicole who used to dream of having a happy ending with my prince- only a little wiser and more focused in more important things in the relationship such as the plans for the future.

Now, I can say that I have intense feelings for him that go beyond “being all smiles” and “being on a high.” “Intense feelings” is in fact a weak phrase to capture my exact emotions. All I can is, I know that I love him because I am willing to sacrifice a lot of things for him, to risk everything just to be with him, and to hold on no matter what challenges may come our way.


Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Crispy Pata Craving

Yesterday, I was craving for crispy pata. It was about past 3 PM and I was busy working at my desk when suddenly, I imagined that I was feasting on crispy pata with rice and toyo with sili as sawsawan plus a glass of cold Coke! Yummy! Hayyyy.. and I guess until now I feel that I need to eat crispy pata!!! :D My taste buds just won't let it go. I can't stop thinking about crispy pata.... how will I get over this feeling???







Weird, but I also feel a bit nostalgic of the thought of crispy pata. When we were younger and my dad was still alive, he used to ask us to buy Ka Hector's ever famous crispy pata near our house. It was the best crispy pata in Pasig I guess! So tender, juicy, and smells good! My brother and I would usually walk hand in hand and enter a small eskinita to go to Ka Hector's house turned crispy pata store. From their gate we would already smell that perfect aroma that we just wanna head home with that crispy pata and start to devour it. Good ol childhood days are just some of the best times in my life. I never get tired reminiscing about them... until now I remember the smell, the feel, and the taste of Ka Hector's crispy pata.

Now, enough of this melodrama portion. I just want to eat crispy pata!!! :D

Monday, September 5, 2011

To be or not to be fat?

A month ago, I was complaining a lot.- I’m getting fat, my clothes won’t fit, I look a bit ugly chubby! I didn’t do anything about it; I didn’t go on a diet or exercise. But a ‘subconsicous’ part of me (if that’s what you call it, like an impulsive reaction that you’re not fully aware of?) knew I was cutting back on eating. I used to eat a lot, pandesal on my desk, cookies in my bag, siomai side trip on my way home… But when comments like “you’re fat” and “you should lose weight” started bugging me, I panicked. I eliminated the pandesal, the ccokies, and just occasional siomai! Just one comment about my size and there you go, I start to feel that the whole world is on my shoulders. Then I’d start googling about “tips to lose weight” and “why you’re fat.” Hello Little Ms. Worry!
A while ago, I got that “you’re getting skinny” comment from three people – my mom, my officemate, and a co-employee from another department. And ironically (or not), I had that same irritated feeling when I hear that “you’re fat” statement. What should I do???
I love my body but I hate it that it changes so fast! If only I could just maintain the ideal weight and look. And why are people around me always take notice of any changes in my body??? Hahaha. I just want to be a bubble! Bubble forever! Hahaha. :D

Now, you judge: Fat or skinny??

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Still counting

“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.”

Yes, sometimes we complain about what's missing in our life, that we tend to overlook many chances to be happy. When times get hard, we fail, or sometimes refuse to understand why we have to go through a certain problem or dilemma. Sometimes it's hard to see through God's plans that we question Him for not having everything we want. But if we just pause for a while and reflect, it's surprising that there's a lot to be thankful for.

Everytime I feel sad, I remind myself of the blessings that I received. Despite the losses, there were gains. Inspite of the tears there were laughters. And even if I had too much heartache, I realize that life is so beautiful after all, because there is love if only you choose to love and be loved (cliche! hehe).

I'm counting my blessings starting this year, and I do hope to count them regularly. Despite the bad and low times, there were definitely a lot of good and happy times:

1. We lost our small business that my mom has enjoyed managing for the past 1 /1/2 years, but at least, our legal battle with some of our relatives finally ended. No more sleepless nights and financial worries. I told my mom that we don't need the unnecessary stress and pain. We survived without that lot and business that almost everybody in our clan is claiming, then we will still survive. God will provide.

2. I'm still saddled with a few loans because of my sister's tuition fee and other house expenses, but at least, my sister finally graduated from college. Now I can slowly repay all my loans. I wanna live a debt-free life... I am now seriously saving for a property, vacation, and wedding! Haha goodluck.

3. I wasn't able to go to the beach at all during summer, but at least I'll be going to Palawan before this year ends. I missed the beach!

4. Two of my closest friends went abroad this year. I'm still not used to the idea that they're out there in a far away land. Sometimes I feel that they're just a call or text away. But at least, I got to see another two good friends this year- one is based in the US and she came back here after 7 long years, while one is based in Abu Dhabi as a flight attendant- we barely see each other even if she ferries back and forth from her homebase to Manila.

5. Early last year, I finally ended an on and off relationship that lasted for almost 9 years. Yes it surely made me devastated, since our separation was not that smooth as I expected it to be. But.. not AT LEAST.. but THANK THE LORD... Mascot came into my life during the most unexpected time. I can't say a lot to explain how happy and loved he made me feel, and is making me feel up to now. My exact feelings are beyond words that sometimes it's a bit surreal for me. I'm just thankful that I have found the one person that I want to spend the rest of my life with. After all that I've been through, I'm grateful that God gave him to me. HE'S THE BEST GIFT I GOT THIS YEAR. :)


Let's count our blessings and be happy! :)

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Sinigang Express

Since I met my dear Mascot, I've been into cooking. I want to write about the dishes I've mastered cooking these past few days. I guess it would help me not forget the ingredients and steps in preparing each meal.

Everybody at home loves pork sinigang. So I guess it's a recipe that I should master. Here's my codigo on pork sinigang:

Ingredients: pork, water, radish, okra, salt, fish sauce, kangkong, Tamarind mix

Steps:

1. Boil pork, wait til it's tender. Put in tomatoes and onions.
2. Add sliced radish and okra.
3. Mix and put salt and fish sauce.
4. Pour in Tamarind mix.
5. Put sili and kangkong, and then stir.

Voila! Pork Sinigang best served hot, with fish sauce as sawsawan. :)



Quotes Quotes Quotes (2)


1. Do you know what happens when you hurt people? They may begin to love you less and begin to forget that they loved you once...

2. If you compare yourself with others you may become vain and bitter because there will always be persons lesser and greater than yourself.

3. Only music can let us sing... Only music can make our feet dance. And only music can let our mind reminisce back to our past. But what's important about music is it can be the voice of what we feel inside especially when we are mute by the words of our hearts.

4. Too many os us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much... for fear that the other person does not care as much, or at all...

5. Why do I call you my friend? Is it because senseless thoughts turn into sensible conversations? Or because frown become laughter no matter how painful the problem gets? Those are just few of the many reasons... The best, I think is that we may not be living in the same world, may not be experiencing the same life, may not share the same memories... but we're still the same, we're still friends no matter how vague life gets.

6. How do you draw the line between love and friendship? In friendship, we create love... In love, we risk friendship. It's hard but I guess sometimes wanting more means losing everything.

7. When your feelings get strong for someone, it's always wise to stop for a while and give your heart time to breathe. A time to use your mind, to weigh the situation based on reason, not on emotion. Because the saddest thing that can happen is when one falls in love while the other wants nothing more than friendship. Love can sometimes be magic, but magic can sometimes be an illusion.

8. Sometimes it's better to be lost anywhere in this world where you can ask for directions back, than be lost inside yourself where redemption lies in your hands alone.

9. It's fatal to believe into something that for sure won't happen... but it's pretty damn deadly not to hope a bit...

10. All of the things in life change. It happens with valid reason. So if you doubt why it happens to you stick to this: we can never learn to be brave and patient if there's only one joy in the world.

11. Don't tie your heart to a person who has nothing to offer you. You may say you're in love, you might even say he or she is your soul mate, but is that enough to fill your need for love? Let it go... It might hurt for a while, but when you get over it, you'll find it's for the better.

12. If you miss an opportunity, do not cloud your eyes with tears... Instead, keep your vision clear so that you will not miss the next one.

13. I may talk everyday like I won't ever get tired... laugh as if it's my last... I give advices to problems like as if I know how to handle mine. I live my life as if everything's just fine... but the truth is, "giving up" is already next in line.

14. The modern Mutual Understanding (MU) - you stay together, spend time with each other, and you share everything... except one thing - commitment.

15. There comes a point in our lives when the heart grows tired. It grows numb from hate, it stops beating for love, it runs out of compassion, it doesn't soften from pain. But not because of insensitivity, but because, it simply wants to move on, and live an uncomplicated life.

16. You won't fully enjoy a swing unless you raise your feet from the ground. You won't fully enjoy a boat ride unless you remove the rope's knot from the river bank. Your dog won't fully enjoy his "dog life" unless you remove the chain in his neck. Lesson: Never ever limit yourself when it comes to happiness, learn how to let go and move on. Life is beautiful.

17. Time may be so fast that we can't guess how long the friendship would stay, but even if time keeps us apart, even when chances push me out and away, remember... I'll never stop to care... despite my absence, between gaps and distances, the promise of you and me being friends remains, lasts, and persists. It may not be under the arms of togetherness and bonding. But beyond words... beyond spaces... beyond hindrances... friends til the end.

18. The best feeling in the world comes when you start feeling good again after feeling awful for a long time.

19. When someone hugs you, never be the first to let go.

20. Not all seemingly happy people are happy indeed... When the fun's over, some sit alone and quietly bleed.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

WATER + SOAP = BUBBLES: THINGS I LOOK FORWARD TO

1. My Mascot to come home – The thought of my one and only love coming home definitely sends shivers to my spine hahaha. I miss everything about him – the way he makes me laugh, the way he looks and smiles at me, the way he holds my hands, the way he touches me, the way he kisses me… and just the way he is!




2. Purchase house and lot / renovate the house - Of course, through housing loan for employees-
With a very low interest (4% per annum) payable in I think 15-25 years. Though sometimes I’m afraid of the thought of being tied to the company I’m working in for what seems like forever because of the loan, I think it’s really a really good deal that I should grab. I’ll stress about the advance payments I intend to make after the loan has been released.


3. Finish Graduate School – Going back to school, so far, has been a fun and rewarding experience. Though it sometimes stresses me out because of conflicting schedule with work, I’m glad that I took the chance to study again. I think 3 more sems and I’m done! Hopefully I pass the compre exam.


4. More savings – Now that my sister has finished school, I can save up more money. I have always wanted to save at least 5% of my monthly salary ever since but I was not able to do so because almost all of my income go to my sister’s tuition fee or loan payments. I’m glad I have accumulated quite a lot of savings since I opened my LANDBANKOOP account. I now also have another bank account which serves as my piggy bank for my savings from my salary every pay day. And of course, I’m looking forward also to the General Assembly of the Quatros Marias Cooperativas with my amigas Bonn, Jen, and Pam – just means more shopping cash for Christmas!







5. Coron vacation – Booked for November this year with Pam, Marly, and Marvin. It’s my major major beach escapade for this year. Would you believe I haven’t been to the beach last summer ever?! So before the year ends, I’m going to Coron, Palawan and chill!


6. Real Estate Sideline – Though I’m already doing initial talks with some of my contacts, I have to really devote more time for this business. I hope I can find time to attend the seminars so I can officially begin working as an agent or broker. I think I can manage this on top of my regular work and school. Is a P30,000 commission every other month feasible? Hehehe.


7. Compile photos – This has always been a dream! I have lots of photos printed out but they’re just stuck in my cabinet. I want to see all of my photos systematically arranged in photo albums. I won’t do scrapbooking though, just plain albums would do. I’m not really satisfied with my photos being posted in Facebook. I want hard copies that can be shown to visitors at home. And personally, I want to browse albums during rainy days while listening to music and sipping a cup of coffee! Bliss. 


8. Convert video tapes to DVD – I have always planned to convert my 7th birthday video (in Betamax) and 18th birthday video (in VHS) into DVD. I’m afraid I would lose those captured memories because the tapes have tarnished already. I want to watch these videos again and relish those carefree days- especially my 7th birthday video where I can watch my dad alive and kicking.


9. Body Scrub – Calling my BSB!!! (Body Scrub Buddy).. It has been ages since we last indulged in body scrub hahaha. I hope that before this year ends, we’ll have at least one BS session.- Wensha or even Let’s Face it (the orig hehe).

10. Getting engaged and married – HAHAHA. Enough said. :D BUBBLES! ;)

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Giddy :D

Waking up with happy thoughts,

Eating a hearty breakfast,

Savoring the cool morning breeze,

Smiling out of the blue,

Humming a love song at work.



Thoughts that excite,

A breakfast that awakens,

The breeze that soothes,

A smile that bewilders,

A song that captivates.



Exciting feelings,

Awakened senses,

Soothed emotions,

Bewildering glow,

Captivating spirit.



Feelings,

Senses,

Emotions,

Glow,

Sprit.



Giddy.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Blahhhhhs and Counter-Blahhhhhs

When I have a hard time getting up in the morning for the entire week, it’s a blahhh sign. Blahhhhh means a lot of things - boredom, irritation, agitation, loss of focus and drive. It’s an inevitable mood, I guess, for everyone who has a routine to follow every day. I know I’m blahhhh when all I look forward to every start of the day is the end of the day.

Is it unhealthy? Of course, many will say yes. Most people will tell me that I should redirect my energy to something more productive to shake away the blahhhs. But how will I do that, when the mere act of thinking about the entire day already irks me?

To a certain extent, I believe that yes, being in a blahhh mood is not healthy because it robs you off the enthusiasm in the things that you usually enjoy doing. But I also think that having blahhhh moments from time to time enables you to gain a better perspective of yourself- your character, goals, and priorities in life. But I will not justify here my blahhhs, I wanna indulge in blahhhs and acknowledge the fact that I’m experiencing blahhhhhs a lot of times lately.

Blahhhs actually don’t just come out of nowhere. It’s a form of emotion which was developed through time, and due to several circumstances:

• When most of the time you are forced to deal with things that are beyond your control
• When you can always predict what will happen and what will be asked of you to do
• When you question yourself if you are doing enough even if you know that you’ve done enough
• When you feel mechanical and robotic of the things that you are doing
• When you start feeling tired because you see that other people do not do much but they can do away with it
• When you catch yourself daydreaming of the person you want to be and the place you want to be, which is of course, not the person you are now and the place you are in.

Fine, I complain and whine a lot. But honestly, I just can’t force myself to feel oh so good about the daily grind at work. Perhaps lately, 85% of the time I know what will happen, and how I will react to things and to some people. And when I feel this, I don’t over react anymore because most of the time it seems de ja vu to me – like I’ve seen this, nothing totally new. This only means, that I’m close to being jaded already.

Being jaded, for me, is the worst form of blahhhh- you just take things as they are, and you don’t feel the drive to make things better at all. You just want to accomplish what you have to do, enough of the bright and out of the box ideas. Your line of thinking is, why take on more work when you yourself is heavily loaded and you can barely comb your hair?

While I’ve been blahhhh recently until today, I’m still hoping that I can regain my excitement with a lot of things at work. You don’t need to push yourself to be more motivated – motivation is not forced upon you. You don’t even have to concentrate more – this may stress you more. And most importantly, you don’t have to pressure yourself to like something just because you have to simply because you will always have a choice. You know that if it’s too much, and you’re not happy anymore, you just have to get out. So as long as you are not getting out, then you still believe that things will eventually be better, and become happier for you.

So for the meantime, if you still decide to stay where you are, then take things as they are. To free yourself from unnecessary blahhhhs, I think you just need to learn to choose the things and people that you will allow to drain your energy. Here’s how:

• If it’s beyond your control, let it be.
• If you can’t handle it, ask help.
• If you don’t want to do it, propose compromise.

It’s easier said than done, I know. But if you think about it, you are worried a lot of what others will say about you. But have you asked yourself what you really want? While at work we don’t get to always choose what we want, remember that there are two essential things that you should do to make things lighter – to simply accept things as they are and to continue exploring for more opportunities beyond work- not necessarily a new career, but perhaps new activities that you will enjoy that are not work-related.

In the morning as you face your computer at work, just look in the mirror and say: “Matatapos din ang araw na ito. Countdown: 9 hours! ”